Birth Story Writing

Write a birth story as soon as you can after each birth, when your memories and the little details are fresh in your mind. Save it and do not edit it again or change anything.

Come back to it later. You may be surprised in what you read, and things that you did not consider before may spring out at you.

If you did not write a birth story, write one from what you can remember of your birth experience. Save it and come back to it in a week and re-read it.

Discussing Birth Experience

Post your birth story on a forum where members will give you critical, honest feedback from their perspective and the things that leapt out at them when they read your story.

Someone may bring up a new or unexpected question for you to consider.

Here are some good avenues for discussing birth listed here.

Birth Story Analysis

Go through your birth story again with a red marker or red text in Microsoft Word. Write down thoughts and feelings that come to you as you read it, within the story itself.

Questions to Consider

The ability to question is a valuable tool for birth processing. Here are some key questions to consider when examining your beliefs, expectations and experiences of labour & childbirth:

• Were there any negative feelings or thoughts, no matter how small or fleeting, present during my birth? What were they and where did they come from?
• Was this (insert event/action/comment/procedure) really necessary?
• Did I find myself wishing for anything in particular at the time?
• What felt good? What didn't?
• Is there anything that could be improved on for next time?
• What were my actions before said event/complication happened? What were my caregiver's comments or actions before said event?
• What influences did the people present at my birth have on me or the flow of my birth?
• How did things go after I gave birth? Did I get enough support to care for my baby and establish bonding/breastfeeding/etc?
• Did I feel vulnerable, exposed, insecure, doubtful or unprotected at any time? Why?
• What choices did you make that led to this and how were those choices constrained by where you were and the kind of care provider you had?]
• Why did you make those choices? What were your background/knowledge/beliefs at the time that led to those choices?

What Now?

Knowing what you know now, what things are you going to do differently next time around? Have a think about your belief structures, and how birth expectations can result in birth experience. Our page on painless childbirth also deals a lot with our thoughts, actions and beliefs translating into real experiences.